There’s a scene in Blade Runner where the line between real and artificial blurs, leaving you questioning: Is there humanity here? Or just an imitation of it?
That’s exactly what it feels like to love a narcissist.
At first, they seem so alive—words of affection, grand gestures, passion that feels larger than life. But when the mask slips, you realize that what you thought was love was only a performance. Empathy—the very core of connection—is absent.
When I was deep inside my own chains, this realization haunted me. I kept trying to bargain with myself: Maybe if I just give more, they’ll finally understand. Maybe if I change, they’ll change too. But no amount of sacrifice could breathe life into someone who had no desire to care.
The absence of empathy is not a small thing—it is the thing. Without it, you aren’t in a partnership. You’re in a one-way arrangement where your heart is drained and your spirit is tested until you nearly forget who you are.
Breaking free isn’t about rejecting love. It’s about refusing to accept its counterfeit. It’s about daring to say: If this doesn’t come with empathy, it isn’t love at all.
When you finally choose yourself, you discover something stunning. The world looks different. Food tastes better. Sleep returns. Your laughter doesn’t feel forced. The illusion shatters, and what’s left is real healing.
And if you’re here reading this, maybe you’re at the edge of that decision yourself. If so—take this as your sign: it’s time to choose real.
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