Trauma bonds aren’t love — they’re conditioning
Today we name the pattern without shaming the person.
A trauma bond is what happens when your body confuses intensity with attachment. It’s when the relationship hurts you, but your nervous system still treats it like “home” because the cycle became familiar.
The push-pull pattern creates a chemical loop: stress, relief, stress, relief. Your body starts chasing the relief — not because it’s love, but because the crash is painful and the relief feels like oxygen.
This is why the “good moments” feel so powerful. They aren’t proof the relationship is safe. They’re proof your system is starving for peace. And when peace is rationed, it becomes addictive.
Naming it as conditioning doesn’t erase your feelings. It protects your future. It helps you stop negotiating with a pattern that only strengthens when you doubt yourself.
You don’t have to invalidate your heart to honor your reality. You can love what you hoped it could be — and still choose what your body needs to heal.
Column A: “What I miss about them.”
Column B: “What the pattern did to my body.”
Circle anything in Column A that is actually relief from Column B. That’s your nervous system telling the truth.
#TraumaBond #TraumaBondRecovery #NervousSystemRegulation #HealingJourney #EmotionalAbuseRecovery #TraumaInformed #BreakFree #ClarityIsPower #YouDeservePeace
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